What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

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Shameless vixen! Trollop!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Why do a lot of women have a crush on my boyfriend when they know he is in a relationship with me? I am starting to feel insecure too. What should I do?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

How did Madri, mother of Nakula and Sahadeva die?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

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Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Trump is going to target known criminals in the country illegally for deportation. The Democrats have vowed to fight him every step of the way. Don't they understand this is one of the issues that cost them the white house, the house and senate?

Make Nazis afraid again!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

What are some good inspirational movies?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Why don't men find fat women attractive?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Why would the state lie about the Earth's shape? We know that it's flat, but why do they lie and tell us that it is a sphere?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

What did your sister do to you that you can never forget?

TEXT:

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

What are some cute stories with your crush?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

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And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.